Out of control downward spiral!

Discussion in 'Prayer requests' started by RosaryWielder, Dec 5, 2018.

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  1. RosaryWielder

    RosaryWielder Founder of Claritas

    I’m so sick of this! Why can’t I stop sinning!?!?!?!??!! I just keep getting worse! I was supposed to be free from this, this fall, now it’s Advent and I’m starting to get worse! I’m so sick of this, I hate it, why can’t I stop!?!

    I wanted to actually lash myself with a belt and yell at myself with the rage of the most abusive father I could muster! I wish there was someway I could beat and tear at my psyche until I finally force myself to stop sinning!

    I feel like I’m on the edge, that I’m about to fall into reprobation or something, that I’ll end up losing the grace to repent and be saved.

    Please help me, please no more, I want to stop this I want to never do this again, I don’t think I can handle one more fall! Please!
     
  2. garabandal

    garabandal Powers


    You must get up each time.

    Say sorry and tell God that you will try again.

    Avoid occasions of sin as best you can. If it means getting rid of a computer get rid of it.

    Pray the Rosary daily and meditate on the mysteries.

    When you fall again - get up. If you fall a thousand times get up each time.

    Repeat the same process -- one day you will stop sinning because you desire it and God will give you the grace to do so.

    You are trying to defeat a habit that is ingrained in you.

    This takes time.

    The sin needs to be replaced by virtue.

    And you need to replace the sin with God.

    It took me over 30 years bit by bit the sin became less and less. Then at times it flared up and took over again and I was in despair.
    But I told God that I would never get up as tempted as I was to despair.

    How often I was tempted to give up altogether.

    But I never gave up. I was like a boxer put down ten thousand times and I kept getting back up. I learnt humility the hard way.

    I think in heaven my name will be 'the one who always got up'!

    But the reason for my falls are the reasons why I am being saved because I kept turning to God asking for grace to over come.

    And now I am free because he has graced me with His Love.

    I am a sinner relying on the power of God, a bird free, soaring above the heavens.

    Our Lady really helps when you pray the Rosary she comes to your aid. Ask her to ask her son for the necessary graces.

    Prayer -- the key to victory!

    Repeat - never give up!
     
  3. SteveD

    SteveD Powers

    This worked for me: wear a blessed Miraculous Medal, when temptation strikes, say the medal prayer; 'Oh Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee'.
     
    Patty, cornhusker, Sanctus and 13 others like this.
  4. Don_D

    Don_D ¡Viva Cristo Rey!

    Listen, you are being besieged right now. Don't give up regardless of your weakness. Don't accept the sin but know always that you are weak. We all are. Act accordingly.
    God made you to have victory over it through Him and you know that so get up, brush yourself off, do what you know you need to and keep trudging the path just like the rest of us. We all go through this. Some of us more than others. The accuser is relentlessly attacking you. It's what he does. You know that right?
    God forgives us and his Mercy is magnitudes bigger than all the oceans of this world combined. Ask His forgiveness and try to add virtue to your life.
    The relentless attacks of the accuser should tell you something so pay attention and refute him at every opportunity and thought of sin. He desperately wants to discourage you.
    Keep praying in earnest that God will grant you the Grace to achieve victory over your flesh via HIS victory and might. We can not do this ourselves, it is only His Grace which wins this and every fight. Not our own.
    I literally sing Ave Maria to myself and pray the Saint Michael prayer and it works. Find what works.
    God bless you, I will keep you in my rosary.
     
  5. Agnes rose

    Agnes rose Archangels

    Please dont be so hard on yourself for being human. I know from experience that those feelings can lead to hopelessness and you are not hopeless!!!! I will pray for you and advise you to find a good priest to work with you through this. st. Michael prayer or even just saying the name Mary over and over keeps the bad guy away. I know from experience with 12 step programs that sometimes we have to take our day one minute at a time!! God bless you. Stay strong ❤
     
  6. Praetorian

    Praetorian Powers

    Because you're human.

    All of us have gone through this.

    There is good advice from those above. Surround yourself in Blessed objects. Wear the Scapular, the Miraculous Medal and the St. Benedict's Cross, each with their own blessing.

    Get over the mentality of "I will be done with this in 2 weeks". It's a lot more difficult than that. Just keep trying. You are weak, but you are trying.

    St. Paul referred to a problem he had as a "Thorn in his side" and wanted God to remove it. He struggled with that thorn for a long time.

    There is a reason for this testing. Perhaps it is to teach you total reliance on God, build your humility or some other reason.

    Remember you live in the most difficult time there has ever been to live a good chaste life. Temptation is everywhere. It is not as easy to avoid near occasions of sin like it used to be.

    One important thing. Don't make this a bigger issue than it is. Yes, it is serious sin, but you are not murdering someone. Your will is conflicted. You are not indulging as a hedonist would. Don't be too hard on yourself. You will give in to despair.

    Don't think of giving up though. A priest once told me the passions die 5 minutes after you are dead. It is not going to be a quick fight. This may be something you continue to struggle with.
     
    Last edited: Dec 6, 2018
  7. "Quis ut Deus"

    "Quis ut Deus" ADMIN Staff Member

    A Saint is a sinner who never gave up trying ;)
     
  8. Praetorian

    Praetorian Powers

    A saint doesn't look perfect. He looks like this:

    rfZ9xSMCbqfl.jpg

    And the devil is doing his best to make you despair and abandon Christ and give up the Church.

    1wewab.jpg
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2018
  9. garabandal

    garabandal Powers

    Love Rocky.

    Yes to be a disciple of Christ you need a Rocky like spirit

    How often we get wounded in the battle.

    But we must learn -- not to focus on our wounds but on the Divine Physician who is able to heal us.
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2018
  10. Bernadette C

    Bernadette C Principalities

    Don't lash yourself with a belt or anything like that.
    Best advice I heard a person give another was.
    'You belong to God.'

    So satan is attacking you in your weakness. You need to turn around and tell satan to get lost. Tell him you belong to God and remind him that as a child of God, Heaven is where you belong.

    It is really up to you to be strong and do your part too.
    You can do this!
     
  11. Timothius722

    Timothius722 Archangels

    Mercy...be merciful to yourself. God will always be more merciful than you can ever expect.Remember St.Paul telling us in the gospel that he too had a great weakness...that when we are weak...God is strong. God knows your weakness...never give up repenting and when you fall...even 7 thousand x 7 thousand times...get up and go to confession and be at peace and always hope for deliverance even until death.
     
  12. Praetorian

    Praetorian Powers

    Love the sinner, hate the sin applies to ourselves too, not just others ;)
     
  13. fallen saint

    fallen saint Baby steps :)

    I've been fighting and sinning for 40 years...I get real close then WHAM back to the same sin. God will work with you... as long as you keep trying. It is a lifetime journey. There is no right answer...just the continuous battle. Few are given the Grace to reach spiritual heights...most of us are slowly walking up the stairs. Two steps up and one step back. But once in a while... you start jogging up those stairs and that is spiritually enlightening.

    May Gods Will be Done
     
  14. Beth B

    Beth B Beth Marie

    I suspected that we are all “practicing “ Catholics :(:).
     
  15. Mario

    Mario Powers

    RW,

    I don't know what sin or sins are connected with your personal struggles. From the age of 12 to about 19, my youngest daughter fought against scrupulosity. It is a deceptively heavy cross to carry for it piles an excessively heavy burden of guilt on one's shoulders. It is not that she is no longer tempted in this direction, but she understands the nature of this beast and knows how to tame it. Unless you are dealing with an addiction like pornography, I offer this suggestion. Look into the issue of scrupulosity. I will contact my daughter and see what resources she is aware of?

    Prayers for you, my friend.

    Safe in the Refuge of the Immaculate Heart!
     
  16. garabandal

    garabandal Powers

    In the spiritual life of the Christian --- the higher order (Intellect, memory and will) needs to dominate the lower order (flesh/passions)

    Prayer (Rosary especially) and the sacraments are key to becoming holy --

    Fasting reduces the hold of the flesh --

    When the balance is correct we have integrated wholeness or holiness!
     
  17. garabandal

    garabandal Powers

    I suppose the flesh is like a donkey or a horse that needs to be tamed by the rider (our intellect & will).
     
  18. AED

    AED Powers

    That was St Frsncis's take on it. He called his body (flesh) brother ass.
     
    gracia, Beth B, Frank Markus and 3 others like this.
  19. AED

    AED Powers

    Garabandal this is such wisdom. So beautifully said. " the one who always gets up"--wonderful. I actually needed to read this tonight. Thank you.
     
  20. AED

    AED Powers

    I will add my two cents here even though the responses and advice offered are wonderful and true. Listen. Just go to confession. Just take all of it to the foot of the Cross. Jesus died to free you f et on this. You have His power--not yours. In yourself you have nothing. None of us do. It is the power of the Cross. Of Jesus's Blood. The devil is stealing your peace. Don't let him. Here is a little prayer I can pray over and over when I feel so discouraged and angry with myself. " Sacred Heart of Jesus I believe in Your love for me and in Your mercy which is greater than all the sins I have committed or ever could commit."
     
    gracia, Don_D, Agnes rose and 5 others like this.

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