Praying for you in beautiful Medjugorje. I have a friend who just returned and felt such peace and graces. I will pray Our Lady graces you with the same. I have been there twice. It changed my life....
I highly recommend speaking to a priest while there. Especially, in the Confessional. Sometimes theres exorcist priests there as well. There are spiritual elements linked to mental health.
Going through a very difficult day today. Feels like God is chastising me. Feel like I'm being punished for something
They say he chastises those who he loves I hope I will be ok. Not sure why God is acting this way to me. I dont know why but I think God hates me. Maybe it is due to the anniversary of Fatima and it is coming from the evil one
Does what you feel (a sense of abandonment; you even use the word, hate) line up with truth? No. So what you feel (I think God hates me) is not true, because God created you to ultimately spend an eternity of joy in His Presence. You must practice speaking the truth to yourself each and everyday: I am the beloved child of God. He loves me and is ever ready to forgive me! I will trust in His Faithfulness no matter what my feelings indicate. You are in my prayers.
Whilst in Medjugorje you should seek out a priest to do a general confession leave nothing out and then accept that you have been cleansed and forgiven through the sacrament.
I just seem to be going through a terrible darkness that doesn't make sense. I am currently on day 3 in week one of 33 day consecration to Mary.