Like so very many Catholic Brothers and Sisters I keep right on waking up at 3 AM , often for quite a lengthy time. In my case , partly it may be due to Night Shifts, though as I recall I used to do so long before I worked in a hospital. I always, clutching my trusty Brass Crucifix and staring at the little stars I have placed on the ceiling Discipline myself to prayer , especially on Meditations on the Passion. It's such a really wonderful time for prayer, so quiet and relaxed , you can hear a pin drop and give yourself 100% to the Spiritual. Like a kind of mini Retreat really, such a joy and consolation. Also a great teacher. So what kind of things have a learned? Well I find on examining my non- Spiritual lines of thought that they are such dross. They stray to such stupid fretting things like incidents that happened , sometimes years ago to disturb me. Perhaps people with grudges or dislikes against me. I really do think these are obstacles placed in the way by demons. I always dwell a while on my dreams. I enjoy this, they are such teachers. I learn so much from them. I also love the presence of the angels and saints and the souls in purgatory. Such a joy. Also my thoughts turn to the semi spiritual, looking at events I observe around me from a Catholic Mystical perspective. For instance the other night I was thinking how people, when we look at them are a little like little glass jars with candles in them. The main candle is the candle of the Holy Spirit. The Light of holiness. So if, for instance as sometimes happens, we meet someone who is a saint, this candle burns inside like a Beacon, illuminating all around , such a joy. Another candle is the light of Lie, the length of days. Each of us has been given a certain portion of days on this Earth and I think sometimes we can have a sense of this in others, Especially in hospitals were length of day is so uncertain. A for instance is a young man I work with perhaps in his 30's. He does not smoke or drink, exercises regularly and is fit as a fiddle. But when I first met him a couple of years ago I thought at once , 'This guy has not long to go'. The candle of life is guttering. But I shook this off as my imagination for from the outside he looked like he would live into very ripe old age indeed. However when the virus came he was shielded and had to leave work at once for 12 weeks. When I asked him why it turns out he has Addison's Disease. Even if he gets just a common cold he struggles with it. He is back at work again. But the virus is still out there. I do my best to throw the good Word to him for he is an Apostate Catholic. But when I look sadly at the guttering candle with I think on the Words of Jesus, Matthew 24:42 Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day on which your Lord will come.
Blessèd are you, Sovereign God, our light and our salvation, eternal Creator of day and night, to you be glory and praise for ever! [Now, as darkness is falling, hear the prayer of your faithful people.] As we look for your coming in glory, wash away our transgressions, cleanse us by your refining fire and make us temples of your Holy Spirit. By the light of Christ, dispel the darkness of our hearts and make us ready to enter your kingdom, where songs of praise for ever sound, Father, Son and Holy Spirit: Blessèd be God for ever!
Very interesting observation! Maybe because you work in a hospital you are more finely tuned in. Have you ever heard the saying, "Green around the gills?" Well, I have seen people who, to me, looked green around the gills. The temples of the forehead. And they weren't around on this earth very long after I noticed that. Signs . . . .I probably should pay better attention .
Death is such a mystery. I sometimes look at recent pictures of the dead , especially the young and wonder if they have had any idea how short their time on Earth was to be. Certainly their Guardian Angels would have known and may often tap them on the shoulder and remind them that they have not got forever for Spiritual Progression and conversion. The demons would also have often some idea through outside observation. Scripture has quite a lot to say about death and knowledge if you read the Church readings for the them. For instance in the Book of Wisdom it speaks of the young being perfected in a short time. In the lives of the saints we often read they have knowledge even to the day hour and minute of their own passing. I am uneasy about this virus in this regard. I met a relative who had it in moderate from a couple of weeks before and recovered. She said she was well but I noticed on her face a certain waxiness I see in dying patients in the hospice. This makes me worry about the Second Wave.
Time is so short. The angels have set forth the trumpet blasts and rally us to prayer. We are called on the Journey inwards. Few of us can look with confidence for all things to stay unchanged. Pray, pray , pray. The World with all it's pomp and Glory is very,very passing. I wish those in the Vatican were more aware of this. If they did they would not involve themselves in so much nonsense.
Yes, I worry about the second wave, too. I planted some Mayhaw (hawthorn) trees this spring. They are about knee high now. You never know . . .I had a recurring dream about 20 years ago of my younger brother Pat. He died in 1968 at basketball practice, just fell over and died. They found some 'flu' in him but not much else. I was 18 at the time, he was 16. It totally changed my life . . .but twenty years ago I had three disctinct dreams of him. All the same thing, he came to me and wanted me to give him some money. He was in a shabby place. I pondered that and felt he was asking me for prayers, he needed to move to the next level. So, I started a daily rosary campaign for him and asked my sisters to pray, too. I asked God to send me a sign that Pat was in heaven, and I specifically asked for white flowers. No one ever gives me flowers! Not even my husband, just never happened. So, i was visiting my grandfather about five months later and my grandpa looked at my husband and said "See that bush outside filled with white snowballs flowers? I want you to go out and pick a bunch for your wife". I was awe struck! I had gotten my answer. And the really neat part, it was my brother's birthday! So, the young folks, they have alot to learn, but too little too late. Such a shame. I read somewhere that a soul spends about 25 years our time in purgatory, and that was about the right timing, too.
I have a friend--devout Catholic--who sees a grayness. Often the person she sees with that "grayness" becomes I'll. It must be a gift of the Holy Spirit and a call to prayer for that person.
Yes. It is concerning. I remember when it first emerged you had a strong sense that it was a deadly thing and a real chastisement. I had a strong sense of that too. But the media has made such a carnival of it--like the boy crying wolf. Now I dont know what to think. Lots of prayer though. Lots of Holy Water being shaken around here. Lots of invocations to St Michael.
I wanted to share my own experience. When I was in 8th grade, someone in the 7th grade died of juvenile diabetes. Call her Nancy. I didn't know her, only of her, and hers was the first funeral I had ever attended. (The entire school went.) She was Baptist, and they don't believe in Purgatory. Well, starting the next Sunday, when we pause to remember the dead, I offered her name. I started doing that every Mass for a few years, thinking of it as a pious practice, and I stopped about the time I left home for University. Well, after a few years, I started feeling this push during Mass to offer her name again. 40 years later, I've had some time to read about Purgatory and the Holy Souls, and I'd been feeling ... not so much compelled, but "encouraged" at every Mass to offer her name all this time. I decided that maybe she was asking me to keep praying for her, so I went to the Parish office and arranged for a Mass to be said for her. I couldn't attend it, but I prayed for her at the time the Mass was held. The very next Sunday, for the first time in 40 years, I didn't feel the "encouragement" to offer her name in prayer! Why me? Well, I think maybe it was because of all her classmates, and especially the ones who were Catholic, I was the only one, even though I didn't really know her, to offer her soul to God that first Sunday after her funeral. I hope and pray that she is among the Church Triumphant and that she occasionally offers a prayer for me.
I've often thought we cant know how charitable we are when we pray for the dead. You did it as a "pious practice" but "Nancy's" gratitude for your prayers will only be known when you get to heaven Especially since no one in her family would pray for her or offer Masses.
I would like to share a little experience of my own about praying for souls. About 25-30 years ago, in another town where I used to live, there was a sweet young hairdresser who I used to bring my little boy to, to get his hair cut. She was in her early 20's, I didn't know her at all and I don't even know her name anymore, but she died of cancer. Now for some odd reason, even after all these years, I still pray for her soul. Since I don't know her name, I just say in my Rosary, for the souls in Purgatory, especially "the young hairdresser", etc. I don't know why I pray for her in particular when I didn't even know her.
