This topic may come across as a personal confession of failure as a Catholic—and perhaps it truly is—but it’s an honest outpouring of something that has been troubling me for a long time. Maybe someone out there will relate to what I’m about to say, even if they’re a much better Catholic than I am. Have any of you ever noticed that some of our relatives are so far removed from the true doctrine of the Church that the more we preach the truth to them, the more we seem to be outlining the boundaries of their invincible ignorance—and even tracing the lines of their own condemnation? Sometimes I wonder whether we should focus solely on silent prayer for them. I know that even some of Jesus’ own relatives thought He was out of His mind, so any good Christian may have lost or wayward members in their own family. And yet, I also remember St. Paul’s words: “Woe to me if I do not preach the Gospel,” and I end up connecting all of this to a personal failure on my part. Has anyone else ever faced the same dilemma—fearing that your very words might define the end of someone else’s invincible ignorance? What is the best guidance when it comes to silent prayer versus active preaching in these cases?
Its difficult for sure. Ratzinger delivered a great lecture touching on this that was later put into a book simply called On Conscience. A hard hitting pojnt he makes is this. Does the truth set us free or rather is it freedom from the truth that is the path of mans true liberation. Is the "yoke" of faith of truth only for the few noble souls and we should refraim from laying such a "burden" on others. This is a poor paraphrase but I hope you get the point.
I have this very same situation in my family and extended family. Growing up my family and my Mom's sister family (each having 4 kids all around the same ages) were very close, we did everything together. As we got older my cousins stopped going to church and my Aunt and Uncle became occasional attendees. My Mom and Dad were complete opposite, daily mass and all my siblings went to Sunday mass or you were in trouble. We grew up in the 70's. As myself and siblings aged one of us went wayward with her "Catholic beliefs" why the other three stayed true to the church. Our kids are a reflection of each of us. My kids are very faithful while my one sister's kids don't even go to church or don't feel they need to all the time. Genetics? I don't think so. I think its the strong parental push when kids are still vulnerable. I think some kids are more vulnerable because they mature late. I can talk with my one sister about alot when it comes to religion and beliefs but my other sister who has different ideas about Catholicism you can't say a word or she becomes a martyr in her own mind. Prayer and a silent example for her and her family is the best recourse for me these days.
I have this problem with my wife.If I try push I'm told I'm too into my faith or too conservative. Before I go further let me just say I'm the greatest of sinners.So in dealing with my wife I may just mention something once or ill hold my tongue and pray that she loves jesus more than I so long as I love him as much as I possibly can.I sometimes wonder though has she a greater chance to be saved than me since I know the truth but still fall whereas she dosnt believe somethings are sin.She goes to mass on Sundays and I'm grateful for that but as regard confession it's been a while.
From those who are given much , much will be expected . All the same the reception of the Eucharist is the greatest sign of one's final salvation .
My aunt and uncle had 6 kids. They were devout parents. One cousin entered the seminary for awhile. We all grew up in the 60's. Today they are a mixed bag as far as faith is concerned. The only girl left the Church completely as an adult and got into new age and has remained so to this day. Two of my boy cousins have become modernist Catholics. The one who had briefly been in seminary died but he still had faith. Two are seriously committed and devout. All raised the same way. It's a perplexing question how these things go. I raised my son's to be devout Catholics while praying for my husband's conversion. He did join the Church but 20 years later left again. All 3 boys left the Church. It's a heavy cross. I pray a lot--daily--have Masses said etc. I trust that Our Lord will do everything necessary to save their souls. But I cant help but have a have a heavy heart. And I know I am only one of many Catholics enduring this heartache. Jesus I trust in You.
