Hi AweakSoul. Blasphemy against the Holy Spirit is said to be a refusal to ask for God's forgiveness. Go to Confession and make as good as a confession as you can. You will sin again after confession but you go to confession again. And if your first confession doesn't go as well as planned, you can always try different Priest's until you find a Priest who you feel comfortable with.
Poor in Spirit, you are being spiritually attacked. Satan is jubilant when he can destroy your Faith. To sin against the Holy Spirit is to sin presuming you will be forgiven. It is to do something sinful without a guilty conscience. If you have confessed your sins you are truly forgiven. They are GONE! Don’t dig them back up. That is called Scruples. Many saints suffered from this including St Therese. We fall but pick ourselves back up striving to be pure and holy. Divine Mercy Sunday has even more Graces for you. Our Good God loves a contrite heart. Yes find a good Priest and come back home.
Yes, I am afraid this is a Spiritual Attack. A good Spiritual Director should untangle it all for you. One it is seen for what it is it will loose all its power over you.
My only fear about going to confession again is that I spoke verbally that night years ago and I remember saying the Holy Spirit. The Gospel of Mark seems to indicate that it is a verbal offense (as did some of the early saints like Jerome, John Chrysodom, and Ambrose. I might have been answering a question, but, just by saying the words, didn't I cross the line that Jesus told never to breach. In my panicked state at the time, I fear I might have believed it for a moment or two, and I know I was angry at my relative for continuing to ask about it at the time. Does that make me the equivalent of the Pharisees? I'm sorry , it's just that I worry so much, and this last year of despair has been crushing. I want to get back close to God, but I fear those words I spoke that night, and I fear that they might not be able to be forgiven, even in confession, thanks to some of the early saints indicating that it should not be granted absolution even if it was confessed. Please, I hope I am wrong, and that God will forgive it. Please pray for me and my relative, I fear we are both doomed.
AWeakSoul, I am a child of God in my early 70s. I love Jesus but fall short of the mark. Why? After all, the Lord loves both you and me to the full. How do I know? First. the Cross. Second, the Cross. Third, the Cross...Father forgive them!!! Jesus spoke these words as he was dying! They are true. No one can change that. As Jesus tells us: No one has a greater love than this: to lay down his life... He did this for you and for me on Calvary. No sin can hold back the torrents of His Mercy if you and/or I confess sincerely. Do I confess sincerely in the hope to avoid sin in the future? Yes. But I still fall at times. This is why Christ gave priests His authority to forgive you and I every time we sincerely approach the confessional. Not once, not twice, but every time you or I repent sincerely. Do you see how you spoke the words "I fear" 3 TIMES in your above quote. Stop!! Take that word out of your vocabulary right now, immediately. Through the prophet Jeremiah, God promises: I have loved you with an everlasting love and I am constant in My affection for you! Speak these words of truth to yourself!!! Memorize them and speak truth rather than the wiles of the enemy! I love you, brother. You must stop condemning yourself and rather entrust yourself to Jesus Christ. Listen not to the devil who wants to lead you back to the muck ASAP Will you slip again? Yes, but learn to wage war on the enemy! Ephesians 6:10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. 11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12 For we are not contending against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world rulers of this present darkness, against the spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore take the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. 14 Stand therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15 and having shod your feet with the equipment of the gospel of peace; 16 above all taking the shield of faith, with which you can quench all the flaming darts of the evil one. 17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18 Pray at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance...
I am afraid the devil is playing you with these thoughts. God's love and Mercy are infinite, trust in Him. Turn to Our Blessed Mother and beg her for help through all these awful temptations to despair. A lovely thing happened to myself yesterday. I was sick and lay in bed for a lot of the day and so did not get to Mass or even say a rosary. My daily schedule was shot and did not even get a chance to take the poor dog for a walk., To top it all it was a dark, dreary winters day, cold, rainy and saddening. I lay in bed late in the morning staring at the ceiling feeling God was a billion miles away and that my day was such a failure. But then the Lord spoke to me and reminded me of the saints who spent days, months, sometimes their whole lives on sick beds. Jesus showed me that this was their vocation just as mine was just this single day. That He did not feel less of the sick for being sick and that I should not feel the less of myself. This cheered me up considerably. The Spiritual Life is not about feelings, it is about giving. Pure love is all about giving. This morning I woke up fine and well, on top of the World. In the darkness of the early morning I heard a little bird singing it's little heart out and thought it was a little like myself up and at it for the day. She reminded me in her song to thank God for this brand new day.
@AWeakSoul Hello dear friend in Christ. So much of what you have shared hits home with me and my own sinful life and past. I am a bit confused though because it seems that you only spoke out loud what the blasphemy against the Holy Spirit is to a friend because they asked but not because you actually felt that way in your own heart. If that is correct, that is not sin. Even if you had spoken it in the past and not known it to be sin, it is bad but it is not sin. For it to be sin, you have to know that it is a sin and then commit the act anyway. That is what makes it mortal. There are 3 tenets of our Catholic faith that all has to be in place to be mortal sin: 1. It has to be of grave matter 2. You have to have full knowledge that it is of grave matter 3. You commit the sin anyway If all 3 do not apply you are not in mortal sin. Telling someone about what makes it sinful out loud does not mean you sinned. The devil is messing with you. In the name of Jesus tell him to go back to hell. As long as you live and breathe you can have forgiveness if you ask for it. God loves you so so much. His mercy and love is far greater than his wrath. If you believe otherwise, then you are committing the unforgivable sin. Get on your knees right now. Tell him you love Him. Tell Him you are so sorry for all your sins. Tell him you do not deserve His love and mercy and are not worthy of it because none of are, but you believe that His love and mercy can even come to you. Tell Him that you want to be forgiven and that you want his help to sin no more. Do all these things right now and then go to confession as soon as you can. As long as you live and breathe you are never lost. All God wants is your love. Give it to Him. He will forgive you 70x70 times. You will sin again and again and again. We all will. We are flawed but can you have the courage, trust and faith to keep going back to Him to beg for forgiveness and to sin no more? Yes you can!
This is the part that concerns me. I had first read about the unforgivable sin a day before I blurted it out. My mind started racing having all these horrible thoughts I didn't want to have, and I was trying to physically fight the thoughts in my mind. By the time I said it, I was exhausted from struggling with it for roughly 30 hours... I didn't want to say it, but the relative kept asking. I tried indicating what it was with euphemisms ("it's calling good bad") but still the questions kept coming. My mind was frantic because I felt like I was dangling from a cliff trying desperately to keep my spiritual life intact while battling the questions and my own mind which had these unwanted thoughts pounding away.... I think that the only reaSons I answered was because maybe I thought that saying what it was would stop the questions, or maybe that if it was answered as a question that it wouldn't be a sin (or maybe that's what my mind was thinking in an exhausted state), but as soon as I shouted it out, I felt the Holy Spirit leave me. I felt my soul grow cold. I kept crying, probably mostly out of self-pity at the time, and that whole next week I felt doomed. I kept thinking it was too late, but I was taken to confession and confessed it and the other things. The priest said it wasn't too late, so at the time, I thought I was forgiven after I was granted absolution, but the doubts kept coming back, frequently. I still worry I did it out of pure malice. I have kept reading an article from 1942 on Catholic Culture which discusses it : https://www.catholicculture.org/culture/library/view.cfm?recnum=6207 and there came more struggles with unwanted blasphemous thoughts. There was another night, in 2019, when strugling with it again, when my relative again began to ask what it was, and I almost answered angrily again, but I felt something, or maybe Someone pulling me back from saying what was the fatal word, and I rephrased it to avoid saying what I didn't want to say. I don't know, I am still intensely worried.... I feel trapped, and my despair has led me to largely slack off on prayers (which I feel miserable about, and I want to get back to saying them) and fear of opening the Bible because the words keep coming back to my mind from Mark's gospel. And I have so many questions... If I did indeed commit it by blurting it out, why then do I feel such crushing guilt (which some sources say would not be felt by someone who committed it), the correct feeling that God always tells the truth, a longing to be back with God, and the feeling that my life is empty without God? And if I am innocent, why did I feel the Holy Spirit leaving me that night or so it felt, and why have I had to battle the thoughts in my mind since?
I did end up going to confession and confessed what I could remember, but then I fell into fear again over the words I said years ago. I wish I could have restrained myself from answering the question that night, that in my manic state, I could have handed my relative a bible so she could read what it was without having to say a word against God. I truly regret what I said by answering the question, but I feel trapped because it sounds like saying the words, even under a combination of intrusive blasphemous thoughts and anger. I am terrified of the day of the Warning and of going to hell. I want God!
The unforgivable sin, is not something you say or blurt out, or some thought that comes to mind, nor is it the "selling of your soul to the Devil" (another trick of the Devil, as it's not yours to sell, or his to buy, it's God's and it can't be sold) or any other such misconceptions that are floating about. According to actual Catholic teaching and the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC), the unforgivable sin refers to blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, as mentioned in the Gospels: Matthew 12:31-32: "Therefore I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven." Mark 3:29: "But whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit never has forgiveness but is guilty of an eternal sin." What Does This Mean? The Church interprets this NOT as a specific action or word, but as a persistent and deliberate refusal to accept God's mercy and forgiveness, even unto death. This is rooted in a hardened heart that rejects the grace of repentance offered by the Holy Spirit. The unforgivable sin occurs ONLY when a person deliberately and persistently right to the very end rejects (Not, once or twice before, or just now and then) the Holy Spirit’s work in their life, refusing to seek forgiveness. You also have to be of sound mind and well, otherwise you are simply not culpable. CCC's Explanation The Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC 1864) states: "Whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit never has forgiveness, but is guilty of an eternal sin. There are no limits to the mercy of God, but anyone who deliberately refuses to accept his mercy by repenting rejects the forgiveness of his sins and the salvation offered by the Holy Spirit. Such hardness of heart can lead to final impenitence and eternal loss." The type of person who commits this sin, is one that is one that has full knowledge of doing so, and has deliberately chosen to do so, and is not the type that will ever worry even one iota about doing so. Say your prayers, and also talk to God about your concerns the way you are talking to us right now, and go to a good Priest you know and trust, talk with them first, have a good confession about everything, and be at peace. Then join the rest of us in the struggle and life long pursuit of trying to be better people and becoming and aligning closer and closer to God, who is infinite mercy, love and peace. Prayer (especially the Rosary), other prayer devotions you like, regular mass, regular eucharist, regular confession, reading scripture, reading lives of the Saints and emulating them as best you can. All will be well. You'll do just fine.
Don’t be frightened by the Warning, it will be VERY frightening to everyone, but at least you will already know the Faith and the prophecies of Garabandal, so you’ll be in a better position than 99% of everyone else. You will not be damned if you forgot a sin before confessing it.
Everytime we go into the Confession box we should be more then a little afraid. So we should be a little used to it all. It we have been honest in the past.
The reason I fear I did it still is because I remember saying the words and then seconds later feeling this horrible feeling inside of me when it felt that the Holy Spirit was leaving me. I kept internally begging the Spirit to stay, but I felt the absence and my head felt cold and terrified. I regretted it immediately, and am still in terror and mourning over it every single day. I didn't say bad things about miracles, but by answering the question I said bad words about the Holy Spirit while angry in front of the person who asked and someone else who was there at the time and after a period of being bombarded by unwanted blasphemous thoughts. So doesn't that make me unfortunately guilty? The gospel of Mark says immediately after God's warning that it was an eternal sin that it was because they had said. I yearn for forgiveness, but I find myself paralyzed again. I see the rising tide of danger, and I just read translated messages from Heaven given to Maneula Strack, which indicate that this is the year of decision, the year of the great apostasy, the schism, the great war, the antichrist appearing. It also says to remain true to the original scripture, and in the scripture, it sounds as though the Unforgivable Sin is a one-time verbal sin. I know the catechism sounds differently, but the Catholic Dictionary from the 50s said it was saying a statement such as that from malice verbally, and I am unnerved by the seemingly conflicting definions between the scripture, the catechism, the church fathers, and saints... Did I commit it out of malice? I feel like I am drowning with this despair, and I am falling into other terrible sinful habits again. I have to change. I want to change. I want to go to confession. But that sin from 2016, those words, still scare me and make me think that I am beyond the pale, if the Scripture verse is any indication.
Nope Nada never impossible no one is beyond the pale unless they reject Gods mercy and forgiveness accept your weakness lift any carry your cross and beg Gods mercy that's your task nothing less nothing more. Do not over complicate it start with the very reason he died on the cross for you
If the spirit you felt left you while you were in confession, that’s a sign that whatever you felt wasn’t from God. Honestly don’t trust “feeling the Spirit” because it can be completely in your head or not from God. That’s why people in false religions feel “the Spirit”, like when Mormons feel a “burning in their bosom” when reading the Book of Mormon. Letting your emotions control your spiritual life is never a good idea. If you’ve confessed all your sins and done your penance, don’t stress about it. Keep praying and fulfill your daily obligations. No one, not a single person on earth today, is beyond the pale. So don’t even let that thought enter your head. Lastly, these modern prophets who have a message every week/month are completely unreliable and should be ignored. It’s always “imminent” yet it never seems to actually transpire. Also the Antichrist isn’t in the world today, the whole idea of him being alive today comes from a condemned heretical apparition (Bayside). The Saints and true apparitions make it clear he won’t appear until after the period of peace. If I was you, I’d stick to fully approved apparitions and Garabandal.
Dear AWeakSoul, Peace be with you. I read your initial post and some of these latest follow ups. It appears that you are misunderstanding what the unforgivable sin is. It is not that you spoke out at God with those words but your persistence in believing the lie from the father of lies, that you have already committed the unforgivable sin. The truth is, that you have not yet committed the unforgivable sin because God is giving you until the end of your life to accept his mercy. Reject those thoughts and temptations because there is still hope for you. I can imagine that Satan is not happy that you are escaping his grasp. Do not let him win. Keep fighting the good fight. God loves you and wants you to believe in His mercy for you. Peace be with you.
Prayers for you. I feel the greatest compassion. I am afraid the evil one is playing games with you. Try and seek out a very holy and wise priest in confession and pour out your soul to him. He will set you straight.
