Dear members of this forum I am a new member, I have always been very spiritual and have enjoyed for the greater part of my life the good life of regular weekday masses, at least monthly confessing, the joy of benediction and regular family prayer; I have trusted the Lord with my life and the direction that my life should take. At present I need prayer. I have been caught up in the world for over 6 years and at first I believed this was a test from the Lord and that my life and everything would return to normal but it didn't. Now I find I can't attend Mass as often as I would like nor can I get to prayer as much as I used to or that I need to. The reasons I became caught up in the world was due to innocent matters, such as the need to pay our mortgage and to be able to provide for my eight children. I have been married to my Husband for 32 years and yes they are all my and my husbands children, our eldest child is 30 years old she is married with three children of her own and our youngest is 17 years and has just finished year 12 [ last year of high school in australia ] and is hoping to be accepted to uni next year. We worked our property for over 20 years until it became impossible for us to pay the mortgage and keep our land so I had to return to work. But it cost me not just time with my Lord but most of the time, I feel lost. I need Jesus more than the average person as He is my life, my love, my all. I am an RN and I care for very sick and pallaitive patients. My roster at the hospital that I work is a real burden I believe the evil one delights in making my roster so impossible and the work load is attrocious to say the least, I work most weekends and am always so tired, it takes me at least my first day off to be able to regain enough energy to just do my house work, I have already reduced my hours to give me extra time but find it is not enough for me to regain my once totally devoted time to my Lord in fact our roster clerk has made my roster even more atrocious. Our mortgage is still enormous and I still need to help most of children as they are all struggling with either university and its financial demands or families of their our. I still have 2 children at home with me and my husband. What I would love is a way to regain my spiritual life and not need to work so much. Please Pray for me. I don't know why God has abandoned me in this hostile world. I only ever feel at home for a short period after my daily spirtual communion. What am I to do? Carolyn
Carolyn, I too have to worry about our business and work every day. I know it is a burden but I do believe God has chosen this for me. You have a wonderful opportunity to show love the Gods special children, the sick and the suffering of this world. The apostles had to come down from the mountain after witnessing the transfiguration and get their hands dirty dealing with hostility and unbelief and their own weakness. Its the same for us. What used our mothers tell us, 'Offer up all the discomforts'. You are saving souls souls when you do so. I try to keep little prayers going in my heart during the day such as 'bless that person' or 'Lord convert that person' or Jesus and Mary save souls'. I would love more 'me' time to spend with the Lord but that does not seem to be in His plan at the moment. God bless you and your family Mary
I will pray for you Carolyn I to work a lot of weekends I go to Mass on Saturday nights , you have a very demanding job, i work in a care home working in the Health/ caring sector can be both physically & mentally draining . Don't be to hard on yourself , as maryrose says offer everything up I hope things ease and improve for you
You have come to the right place Carolyn - welcome. I think you would get a lot out of reading Mark Mallett's latest blog. http://www.markmallett.com/blog/2012/11/the-stones-of-contradiction/#more-9396
At the Feet of Mary. My mother told me one time that before she got married she liked to pray a lot especially in front of the Blessed Sacrament. However when she started having children she found she had less and less time (she ended up with ten of us). Worried about this she went to a holy old priest in confession. The priest laughed and sais to her,'Yourchildren are your prayer'. She told me as soon as the priest told her this she worried no more about it ever again. Its clear to me that your duties of state are your prayer and very strong and powerful they are. But I'll pray your cross eases for you.
I keep everyone on here in my prayers and before The Blessed Sacrament which I try to get to several times a week.
Thank you to all you kind people for your prayers. I am very humbled by the kind thoughts and concern. I read the mark mallett blog, it is truly inspirational Thank you. Having my beautiful children was the greatest blessing of my life yet also the most frightening blessing, as the many tribulations and sorrows that accompany each day as a mother are far too numerous and complicated to even begin to explain. For 25 years I had one of the most holy and devoted priests as my confessor sadly the Lord has called him home and I find I really miss him, however he often exhorted me to be less harsh on myself, as I said a wonderful priest. One thing I remember him telling me is that Jesus is my best friend and what sort of best friend would be upset with you if you were unable to contact them for a while? The yearning I have for all things spiritual and for time is very intense; I am just offering up this yearning and the associated sadness and am hopeful this time will pass one day soon. I find the world very scary and am very fearful about my children’s choices in life [I have good reasons for this] and that is why I need the Lord and His peace and my life back as it was. Please forgive my sporadic time of reply and for not being able to be more consistent on the computer, I find I get very little time on the computer. Once again thank you all and I will keep you in my prayers too. Carolyn
Welcome josephite! I used to believe that as each of my children grew up and left home, the challenges they presented me would lessen and life would be easier. What I have instead found out is that once a parent, always a parent! I continue to be concerned for my six children, but because five of them are out of the house, I no longer directly form them or protect them. I must let go, pray more earnestly, and trust in God's providential care for each of them! This process of becoming more detached day-by-day has proven one of the most difficult lessons of my life. I'll definitely hold you up in prayer. Will you please pray for me? I think Padraig's memory of his Mom contains much wisdom! Safe in the Hearts of Jesus and Mary!
God knows the very desires of our heart - our desire for our children's salvation is also close to His Heart too. What Father knowing that his child desires something so much would refuse to grant us the desires of our heart and he is faithful to the end. We need to worry less and trust more in Divine Providence. Even when ti seems all is lost he is able to snatch victory from defeat and life from death. He is able to grant the desires of our heart. Victory and Glory are His forever. Psalm 37 Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging bread. 26 They are always generous and lend freely; their children will be a blessing.
I am praying for you Carolyn. I too am in the same boat, where I have to work on pretty much every Sunday so it is difficult for me to get to mass. Also, I only have 1 day off a week, so that day I'm exhausted, need to do laundry, food shop, etc. I'm also looking for a career job to get me out of this current situation, but because I have to work so many hours at my minimum wage retail jobs, it's hard to find the time and energy for that. It's a vicious circle!! So I understand how you feel and will pray for you. At least you have a job that helps society (nursing), and as has been posted...your children are your prayer. That is such a blessing!
Dear Potatosack, The prayer below is for you: August Queen of the Heavens, Heavenly Soverign of the Angels, Thou who from the beginning recieved from God the power and the mission to crush the head of satan; Humbly we beseech thee, to send thy holy legions, so that under thy command and through thy power they may pursue the demons everywhere, combat them, supress their boldness and drive them back into the abyss. Oh who is like unto God! Mary thou shalt always be our Queen, our Mother and our Hope. Holy Angels and Archangels defend us, guard us and protect us. Amen.
Dear Maryrose, Maryn, Jayneturner, Garabandal, Padraig, Roryrory, Mario, Potatosack and everyone that has been anonymously praying for me, Thank you all and please accept this as my continued thanks and gratitude. The prayer below is for all of you, who I consider my friends: Joseph, in caring for Jesus Our Lord you cared for all of us, Into your loving care I confidently entrust my family, my friends, all who are dear to me, all who have asked my prayers, all for whom I ought to pray, [especially those whom I have injured] and all who have no one to pray for them. Do for them, Joseph, everything you did for the Son of God, who called you 'father'. To Him present them. Joseph, ask Jesus with a fathers confidence to recieve them forever into the shelter of His most Sacred Heart. Amen
I really sympathise with you Carolyn. I feel exactly the same way. Its dreadful to want to go to Mass and just not be able to. I have actually spent a lot of the last year simply praying to God to get me off the treadmill I am on, so that I can find time to pray, get Mass and begin again to say the Rosary. Its horrendous. The recession here has not helped at all. At a time when I was expecting to have more time to put God totally in the centre of my life, I find I am now working harder than ever just to stay afloat. Like you, I am constantly tired, completely worn out and up to recently very, very disheartened. If it is any help, I have realised that all the pressure is another form of Prayer. God is right with me during all of this upheaval. That is what I believe right now. Of course, I may be back to my disheartened self tomorrow. All I can say to you is to keep going. Pray when you can (the only time I seem to find to do this is on the bus going to and from work) and keep asking God to help you to find the time and the energy level to get Mass again, even if it is only one day during the week. In the meantime, I will pray for you.
Dear responders to my request and rosebud and foundsoul, Thank you all so much. I must state that my husband and my two children that are still at home have been more open to the daily rosary and we have now incorporated the rosary once more into our daily lives: Praise the Lord. This has been a great blessing. Also my husband, who is a convert and became a catholic just before we got married, use to often lament that because our family was so religious, the devil would attack us so much more than others [which of course is correct but God always gave us the grace to perservere] but Michael became so sick of the attacks that he began to blame God for everything that went wrong and even hated to see me or the children pray, he would only grudingly come to mass and then berate me about the many sufferings our family endured and for a period of time he made it very difficult for myself and our children to practice our faith, even though we did. I would collect my children every Friday from school at 1030 and take them to confession, adoration and mass which began at 1200 on friday after adoration, and we always attended mass on Sunday and said the daily rosary even though Michael made it extremely hard, it was a real cross. Don't get me wrong Michael is a good man and you would have had to know the extent of the trials that we as a family endured to understand why he felt the way he did, he still hold's these beliefs now to a lesser extent. However, I must state that lately he is the one that is insisting that we get to mass no matter how tired I am and this is a real help as his support is what is needed at present. One thing I can state with certainity is that life as a Catholic Christian is never boring. Thank you all, the Lord's graces are activated with prayer and suffering. A prayer for all of us. Joseph, in your life on earth you well knew the agonies of doubt and uncertainity. Look with compassion upon all of us who are in need of wise counsel, pray for us to the spirit of wisdom, of counsel and of understanding, to aid us with light and truth. May your own example inspire us to submit ourselves wholly to the will of God and to the leading of the Holy Spirit. May your prayers win for us the strength to follow that leading and may we experience the Joy to be found in being one with the Lord in saying, 'Father thy will be done'. Amen
I suppose that there is hardly a Catholic in the world today who does not strubble to keep the andle alight; for there are so many dark wonds trying to blow it out. I think its true that only Catholics who are mystics/ people of real deep prayer will keep the Faith. THat the time os fast approaching when there will be no greys, only black and whites.
