I'm finding it very difficult to keep going. I keep praying and saying the Rosary. That's the best I can do at the moment.
I understand. I do. My challenges are not like yours but I am in the midst of challenges right now and saying the Rosary is about all I can do too. Hang on Peter. We are all in a time of testing. The Rosary is the chain that binds us to Our Lady. The devil hates it. So let's keep praying it!
Thanks AED. I'm still afraid that I have done something to damage my relationship with God. I gave out to him a few years ago and called Him names. I repented of it but feel that something is blocking me off from him. I hope He loves me and forgives me. I am experiencing terrible confusion at the moment and am wondering is it a punishment
You confessed it. You felt genuine sorrow. I bet you are not the only one who has gotten mad at God. But you are His child. He knows you. Better than you know yourself. Being a parent has helped me understand to some limited human extent God's immeasurable love for us. Any parent here will you tell you there is NOTHING a child could do in anger or frustration or meaness that a parent will not forgive even without the child asking for forgiveness. And if the child is genuinely sorry and devastated to have done it the parent's heart overflows with love and joy. And our love is a drop in the ocean compared to God's love. Trust me on this Peter. God is not blocking you. It may be the evil one distorting your perceptions or your own guilt and accusation against yourself but it is not the Father. It is not the Father. Jesus showed us this clearly in the story of the prodigal son.
Jesus has never abandoned you, Sanctus, and will never abandon you. This is a fact despite your fluctuating feelings. His Love is unfailing no matter what. I'm glad I can picture you when praying since we once shared a skype session on the internet with other MOG members during covid. Remember? O Mary conceived without sin, pray for Peter!
Peter I was thinking about you today and I heard in my mind "peter can not see the woods for the trees" and again I heard "he gave sight to the blind that they may see" Could you maybe try something for me instead of trying to feel God's love for you would you try and look for Gods love in everything around you and in your life, he is there in every breath you take, every person you greet and all that you can see around you. try and focus on that, Ill leave you with a great poem from a great Irish Man Joseph Mary Plunkett. I see his blood upon the rose And in the stars the glory of his eyes, His body gleams amid eternal snows, His tears fall from the skies. I see his face in every flower; The thunder and the singing of the birds Are but his voice—and carven by his power Rocks are his written words. All pathways by his feet are worn, His strong heart stirs the ever-beating sea, His crown of thorns is twined with every thorn, His cross is every tree
I lit a candle to a statue of saint Therese in a nearby church earlier. Perhaps she brought those words to mind for you! I will practice what you asked, john.
I hope with all my Heart that you can still get on pilgrimage to Medugorje as intended . I see great hope in that Peter. I have been praying for you as I know many others have. I so wish I could do more. But I know that God has heard our prayers and is acting on Him. Still I feel so helpless here in the face of your pain and so wish I could do more. I hope, I really, really hope you can get to Medugorje, if only for some peace and joy for a little while.
Received holy communion today and received anointing of the sick again which seemed to help hopefully everything will be ok I'm trying my best
Praying for you today. Prayed last night too. I am so glad you are receiving the sacraments. I am really praying for your trip to Medjugorge.
