He is 20 years old and recently he has been smoking marijuana. He thinks there is nothing wrong with it and feels it makes him stronger and understand others better, etc. He thinks he is closer to God because of it and sounds really far out. I have tried to convince him of how God would not have him doing something like this that will harm his future. I am so depressed about this and I am about to make an appointment with my priest to speak with him about it. I hope it will help. So please pray for deliverance for him. I do each day, but I am not familiar with this at all. Both my boys have never been any problem at all, so this is new to me. Thanks for your help. God bless, ~Rae
Rae, Approach you son with this...although marijuna has medicinal purposes ( glaucoma,cancer patients) it is illegal, it is a crime. 85% of prisoners are drug related. It can lead to other drugs, which in turn leads to self destruction. Period. Once one partakes in dabbling in drugs leads to paranoia,theft, and they become a prisoner in their own home. Employers screen for drugs...this leads to not getting a job. It also leads to losing a job. Once caught , it goes on their record therefore making it extrememly difficult to get a job once their record is tainted. Society is not that forgiving, although it is better today somewhat. I would refrain from any financial assistance at all as long as the drugs are being consumed. I would lay down the law NOW. I would say if you engage in this, lose your job etc , Do not come to me for help. Because if you do, then you are feeding the disease, if the disease is not feed it cannot survive. It is a very difficult situation for the parent. But you must be tough and stick to this rule. Of course you love him and will continue to pray for him, but no money, food is okay, because most people that do drugs do not eat, ( not marijiuna) but the others) they need to eat and follow the hypoglycemic diet. I cannot convince the enablers in my family to follow this rule. This went on for a decade and is still going on, the enablers just as well should have handed these kids a gun. They keep bailing the kids out in every single situation which resulted in mega expense on-going and jail and records ...and so forth. They do not keep a job. They are given money, a place to sleep, a car, and they do not will to want to live, nor work. I blame the parents. The grandparents too. Yes, the kids have free will, they have to make the decision..but do not give them the cushion. Nip it as early as you can before it can spiral out of control. Let them know they are loved but take a stand. Tough love.
If he is living at home, lay down the law..zero tolernace for drugs. Take him to get drug testing..you will not get into trouble for that..there is help out there..Narcotics and alcohol meetings..go to al-non meetings..they can help or call the hot line..for help. There are a lot of caring people and they understand. I am sorry and I hope he can see the light soon. In my prayers Rae. It has been a nightmare around here, but it was not marijuana..worse. It destroys families. I had to research this and all but getting the parents and grandparents to do what was good for the kids, forget it, they will not stop until they have hit their rock bottom.
One more very important thing which you can and should tell your son - marijuana kills the brain cellc and impairs your cognitive function, despite the popular culture beliefs. If one wants to achieve anything in life, he should not engage in any recreational drugs , not because it is plain wrong, but because the consequences are so long lasting and damaging that it is just not worth it. And there is this cultural myth "everybody is doing this, look all the celebrities, including presidents, got away with it", But there are also plain statistics - for one person who has got away with it there are thousands who did not. Marijuana can be detected in the hair months after initial exposure, even after one time "fun"
Yes it does kill brain cells and all drugs do , hair analysis tells all. They are resorting to hair analysis since the users know the ways to get around the drug testing. The enablers that are co-dependent need just as much help. They feel they are indeed helping for this is how they were brought up, as the caretakers of the addict parent. This is the big problem as you say insearch, following the crowd, everyone does it, it is no big deal! God gives us all free will, He allows it to continue sometimes without intervention , well that is how I see it. The person must see the reality of it all...what good does it do me, what are the consequences, is it worth the risk.. They must be fed the truth. Our children need to have a good self esteem and that is seeing the good in them and teaching them how to survive. Survival skills. Holding our kids accountable starting at an early age is tough as well. Parenting is one tough job!
Praying too. There is a definite link between cannabis use and mental illness: http://www.christian.org.uk/news/grieving-father-tells-of-sons-drug-induced-mental-illness/ Rae - you are not alone - I believe our Lady is so, so close to you because she understands a broken heart. A big, big hug across the internet. This may take prayer and fasting.
I inquired about drug addiction and i met this man that treats all addictions. Gambling addictions, drug, alcoholism,all of them in fact and he claims he had a high succes rate by having his patients follow the hypogycemic diet. He said it is a nutritional disorder. He is a retired police officer. Now he has a clinic and this is how he treats them.
Rae. I am going to offer up my Holy Hour for your son and will say a rosary for him. My heart goes out to you. What a cross! Unite this cross to Christ's for your son's healing. I believe very much in the power of prayer and God lifting things. I shall be praying for this. May God bless and strengthen you Rae, and may He shine His face upon you and bring His true peace into your home.. Rae... if your son tells you tonight or tomorrow that he can feel angels or loads of people in the room, don't freak out.. I have asked God to fill your home with many angels, asked Mother Mary to walk through your home with all her angels.. I don't think we could count them all between us.
His claimed increased awareness is simply the subtle, hallucinatory effects of the drug. I will hold Daylen in prayer. Safe in the Hearts of Jesus and Mary!
Thank you all for your suggestions and prayers. I will take all you have said to heart. My heart is breaking, because I am not the co dependent type, I know I might lose him by refusing to allow him to do this sort of thing in our home or his grandmother's home. But he's been warned already ... years ago that drugs are no no... I might not get to speak with him today. Hopefully I will. We will see. I'm storming heaven myself, that he be protected from this evil. But I'm at work, so I have to concentrate here, too, but it is so hard today. Thanks again for all the prayers. God bless, ~Rae
He will return ...at this age too the brain is not fully developed until age 25, this is the frontal lobe, reasoning and logic can play a part here. Children stray but they mostly return and live as they were brought up. It always is in the back of their mind, they want to please their mother. Have a good cry and give it all to God. Tell him how much you love him when you see him next.
Rae...perhaps I'm being too nosey but...I wouldn't be overly concerned...he is young...he is sowing his oats. He may have a strong self will. He may be one of those people who has to experience things before they become real. I was the same way...you couldn't tell me something...it just wasn't real. It was not until I experienced it that it became real. Real pain and suffering waken the intellect to the reality of good and evil. It is natural you want to protect him from evil and suffering...but you can not lead his life. He must learn on his own. Simply tell him not to smoke pot in your house and if you find it, because it is illegal, expect it to be thrown away. Don't harp and quietly correct, overlook his failures and pray for his conversion. In due time with maturity and increased wisdom he will learn the whys and why not.
That is what I did... I also layed down the law. Daylen lives with my mother (she is elderly now and we didn't want her to be in the large house alone. At the time we figured Daylen was old enough and responsible enough to have a little more independence). My younger son, Will, lives with my DH and I. But I see Daylen each day because we ride into (work for me, school for him) together. He is a sophomore in the college I work at. I wouldn't be overly concerned if Daylen was not disprespecting my mother by smoking in the house. That's how I found out. I had to go to the bathroom yesterday, so I went in the house when I picked up Daylen and the entire house smelled like "the stuff". I could not believe he would do that. Then when I confronted him about it, he didn't think there was anything wrong with it. And he thinks God is talking to him telling him that he has to find an antidote for the Zombie apocalypse, enough to save his family. So that is why he makes no sense to anyone. He sounds nuts. He says if he doesn't smoke he will not hear God. Of course I told him that God would not speak with him that way, but he didn't want to listen... this was all yesterday. Today is somewhat better. He said he had a good sleep last night and he handed me the last of "the stuff" (without my asking) and I flushed it down the toilet (wasn't sure what else to do with it). He will be speaking to the priest today or tomorrow (I hope today... waiting for a call back) and having some EAP counseling. Yesterday, after his Zombie apocalypse speech, he asked me if he could see a psychiatrist. So that is a start. And when I asked if he would speak with Father, he said he would. I'm letting you know all this so you can better understand why I was so upset yesterday. I could just see my baby destroying his life all by himself, regardless of what I said to him. So I had to call on the big guns for help. Please keep the prayers coming... they are obviously helping, I never doubted that they wouldn't. The Immaculate Conception, many Saints, and God's Holy Angels have come to the rescue. They are working on my son as we speak. I can feel it. Thank you all so much for the prayers. I am praying all throughout the day also. Trusting in God. God bless, ~Rae
Good Rae! There is no bond or greater love than the love of a mother, even after death, it can never be seperated.
Rae RAe, I got this quote from the book Maria Valtorta..I gave back the book so I did not quote it verbatim..but this is how the Blessed Mother feels about Jesus..i wish I could find her exact words..it made me cry when I read it. I am not a father, but I know Fathers have a very special relationship and role for their children as protectors .
praying for you and him Rae. I don't understand this zombie & vampire fascination by both the young and some adults.
Rae, Pray to St Monica....think of what she went through with St Augustine and he finally converted. She is a powerful prayer saint for mom's with son's in trouble!
